Thursday, March 27, 2014

Great Adventure, Great Company, Great Barrier Island Cycle Touring


There's a lot to be said for sharing experiences with that special person in your life. For years, I have invariably resigned myself to the fact that my adventures would be done alone or with a group of friends, then played back in photo form to my loved one at the end of the weekend whilst they fell asleep from boredom on the couch next to me. I have no problem with being a loner... In fact, there is a certain charm to doing some stuff alone... The experience is a very different one with a partner in crime by your side, though... Not necessarily good or bad. But up until just recently, the opportunity to share my crazy adventures with that special person in my life had eluded me... And not for lack of want... Maybe I just hadn't found the person who was the right fit for me yet.

 

I started dating Lisa late last year in September. We share the same adventurous spirit, enjoy the same things, and both have a habit of packing our lives full of "stuff", booking out our weekends seemingly a year in advance. Arguably, Lisa isn't quite as crazy as me... She doesn't ride her bike during sleeping hours, or camp in the snow, or use TOPO50 maps to plan hideously long journeys which take 5 hours more than expected (although I'm working on it!), but she has a spark in her brilliant personality that makes me smile, and she is easily convinced to accompany me on adventures. I'd like to think that the adventures we enjoy together have introduced something new and exciting to her life, much the same way that the addition of her infectious enthusiasm, scintillating company and beaming smile to my otherwise lonely escapades has changed the way I experience things.

 

We'd been together a few months before I was brave enough to float the idea of a cycle tour, and soon enough, we were planning our three day, fully self-supported cycle tour around Great Barrier Island for the Auckland Anniversary long weekend. Taking a partner on a journey like that can really make or break the relationship and it can be hard to genuinely convince someone that your primary intention is to enjoy the scenery and spend some quality time with them in the great outdoors, as opposed to using it as a formula one testing ground to rip their legs off. The plan was that I would carry all our shared gear and anything heavy (tent, food, cooker) and Lisa would just carry the essentials, such as her clothes and sleeping bag. This way, I would be a bit slower and hopefully we would enjoy the trip riding at a similar pace to each other. I was nervous... I wanted nothing more than for Lisa to enjoy the ride, and I knew that she was nervous for her own reasons, and understandably so...

 

Friday afternoon we had our bikes loaded up with all our gear and rode to the ferry, where we boarded with a handful of other people looking to escape the rat race for the long weekend. The evening was beautiful and calm and we sat on the ferry with the sun warming our faces and a beer in hand. As the island loomed in front of us on the horizon, we marvelled at the greenery, rugged landscape and hilly terrain (actually, I'm not sure Lisa was so excited about the hills as what I was). After unloading from the ferry and battling the crowd, we made our way down the road to the Stray Possum where we would stay the night before embarking on our adventure the next day. That was the last we saw of any crowds for the weekend... It was like all the traffic from the ferry dispersed to various corners of the island, diluting any evidence of human presence.
 

I'd been to Great Barrier once before for a race and remembered it as an idyllic, rugged landscape, relatively untouched with quaint communities scattered across the island, and as we strolled along the road on dusk, I enjoyed breathing in the fresh air scented with native greenery, listening to the birds rustle and talk amongst the trees... Back at our accommodation, the lights ran off a generator (there is no electricity on the island), and the absence of city bustle made the night so dark that the stars punctuated the black sky with their brilliance. We really were a world away from where we had come from some 5 hours ago... and I couldn't think of a single person I would have preferred to share the experience with.
 

The following morning, we awoke to a brilliant day with blue skies. After conferring with some local advice on our route, we headed away from Tryphena and up Rosalie Bay Road. We found throughout our trip that the local residents were warm and generous with their information on the island. As it turned out, Rosalie Bay Road ended up being the biggest climb we would do in one hit for the entire trip. The loose, gravelly surface made for hard work, but the load on our bikes helped the tyres gain extra grip (that was a bit of a love-hate relationship!). We reached a dead end at the top of the climb and sought out the trail head for the track that descended straight down into the east end of the beautiful Medlands Beach. The last time I rode this trail, it was a rough, rutted piece of gnarly walking track. Since then, it has been rebuilt and resurfaced, so it is actually a very rideable piece of trail. In sections, the track was steep, and there were some rather sharp corners to negotiate. Lisa took to riding with a load on her bike exceptionally well whilst I fumbled awkwardly around corners with the dry bag slapping around on the rack. I knew it wouldn't take long to adjust to the load (it always took an hour or two), but it was frustrating nonetheless, and I felt like a bit of a goof.
 

Arriving at Medlands Beach, we parked our bikes up and went exploring around the rocks on the beach. The views were spectacular and we were quite stoked to come across a birds nest in amongst the rocks that had some babies nesting in there. The white sandy beach and clear blue water was inviting, but we had a relatively long day planned, so decided to save the swimming for the end of the day (both for reasons of time and chafe-avoidance!). The plan was to do a fairly long day the first day and get it out of the way so we could have a cruisier second and third day to enjoy the sights a bit. It also made sense to do our longest day on fresher legs.
 

We rode from Medlands over to Claris, where we stopped for a bite to eat at a cute little bakery by the side of the road called "The Lunch Box" (great food, by the way!)... Lunch was consumed, ice cream had, and hideously expensive suncream purchased and we continued on our way. The road from Claris through to Awana was relatively flat with the odd bump along the way, which made for quick travel and cruisy sight-seeing before we began the climb up Aotea Road towards Harataonga. It was a hot day and we could smell the bitumen melting whilst it stuck to our tyres as we climbed. We zig-zagged across the road to take advantage of every bit of shade that presented itself... It was of little comfort that the previous time I had ridden this road, it was unsealed. We had decided that instead of riding straight through to Okiwi, we would descend into Harataonga and ride through the coastal walkway... This served the double purpose of avoiding a huge climb up Aotea Road and also providing us with some more interesting riding and views.
 

The descent into Harataonga was a relief in the heat and we found ourselves back at the coast in a cute little bay before picking up the coastal walkway and climbing into the native bush. The coast ran directly parallel to the track, but was, for the most part, completely obscured by the trees. On occasion, though, the trail would burst through the trees and lay in front of us brilliant vistas of rugged bays full of turquoise blue water bordered by white sand beaches which, in turn, were bordered by brilliant green hillsides surrounding the coastline. It was truly stunning. The trail was undulating and sneakily chewed away at our energy stores as we rode on. It snaked it's way through the trees, providing us with some much-needed shade. Occasionally, we had to dismount and awkwardly manhandle our bikes over deep, rutted creek crossings. As we rode, the track deteriorated from a well-maintained gravel trail to rough singletrack, still very ridable, and great fun, but hard work, especially with a load on. It took a lot longer than expected, and each time we rounded a new bay, we expected the next to be the end of the track and it wasn't. We delayed stopping for a break in the hope that soon we would pop out onto the road and sit down for a break, but we started making silly mistakes while we were riding, and we started getting hangry (hungry angry). Finally, Lisa declared that she was stopping to eat something and I reluctantly agreed. In hindsight, we should have stopped sooner, but it is often the way when you want to keep moving.
 

As was often the case with my adventures, this particular part of the trip was taking longer than expected. I am a map geek, but regardless of how much I trawl over the map, it gives me no information on terrain, and the length of the track can be hard to judge when it is so windy. We sat in relative silence whilst we refueled. I was mega impressed at Lisa's resilience, but I felt guilty that there had been a requirement for her to be resilient because of my poor planning. As it so happened, as we crested the next hill, we began the insanely fun descent into Okiwi, negotiating sweeping bends through the forest, over rocks and down sections of red dirt trail that we aptly named "Mars" (I vaguely remember crashing in front of Lisa on one of these sections, but we shall never speak of this again). Occasionally, we would steal glimpses of the coastline as the trail flashed by until we were stopped dead in our tracks by the most stunning view we had seen all day (the fact that I had been riding behind Lisa apparently didn't count as "view of the day")... Sprawled out in front of us was a stretch of coastline that included the Whangapoua sand bar, which jutted out into the brilliant blue bay like a long white finger. Whangapoua Campground had been our "plan B" if we had run out of steam for the climb over to Port Fitzroy, but little consultation was needed to decide that we would continue on to our originally planned destination.

As we rode through Okiwi, we had a chance meeting with a couple of Lisa's friends, who had married the weekend before and were honeymooning on the island (what are the odds???), then just as we reached the climb out of Okiwi, we happened across a local fair, with music, food and crafts. We stopped by and chilled on the grass for a bit with a drink and some tasty BBQ treats, and used the opportunity to fill up our water bottles, then continued on our way, keen to arrive at our destination, pitch our tent and settle in for the night. The climb out of Okiwi towards Port Fitzroy wasn't as bad as we had expected. It was all tarseal and was an easy enough gradient for us to just spin our way up. As we descended into Port Fitzroy, we passed the general store (closed now, but would be useful to stock up on supplies tomorrow) and managed to score a free beer from a fisherman before we continued on to our campground for the evening.
 


It blew me away that we were pretty much the only people at the campground on a long weekend. We chose prime position, right in front of the water, and decided to go for a bit of a stroll to see if we could find a swimming spot. The western side of the island was very different to the eastern side and the coastline here was a rugged mix of rocks and oysters and the fact that the tide was out made it difficult to find a spot deep enough to take a dip in. We ventured to the waters edge with our shoes on and Lisa said something about taking off her shoes to go wading in the water. No sooner had I said "please don't cut your feet on the oysters", than she limped out of the water with her feet bleeding from a series of deep oyster cuts... I vehemently resisted the urge to say "I told you so" (such phrases rarely contribute positively to the mood on trips like this) and made my way back to the bikes to get my first aid kit out (hey, at least it got used and we didn't carry it unnecessarily, right???). Lisa tended to her cuts whilst I pitched the tent. The desire to go for a swim had waned by this point so we enjoyed a cold campground shower before wrapping up in our warm clothes and settling in on the grass to enjoy our free beer and cook dinner.
 

Our post-beer hot chocolate with powdered milk and marshmallows tasted ridiculously good and whilst we waited for our dinner to rehydrate for us to enjoy our feast, we chilled on the grass, enjoying the antics of the cheeky Brown Teal Pateke ducks that seemed intent on eating anything that we put on the ground (edible or not). We enjoyed our dinner then lay under the crisp evening sky to watch the sunset over the bay whilst we recounted the experiences of our day and had a good laugh. I was so impressed with Lisa's efforts. We had ended up clocking up 50km for our first day... And that was a hard 50km, as well, with singletrack, a good chunk of climbing AND a load. It was stoked that Lisa had enjoyed it, even if it did mean we were quite tired.

Throughout the evening, we were occasionally disturbed by the brisk wind that had whipped up over the hills, and by my annoyingly small bladder. I rarely sleep well in a tent... There are so many things happening in and around the tent to stimulate my mind and distract me from slumber. Lisa got up at one stage and could barely walk for the pain in her feet from the oyster cuts. I was quietly concerned. Firstly because I didn't want the cuts to get infected. Secondly because the only way we had to get back to Tryphena was on our bikes. I hoped that she would discover in the morning that riding a bike was actually less painful for her swollen feet than walking, but failing that, if worst came to worst, I could ride back to Tryphena and hire a car to come and pick her up. I felt reassured that we had options and a couple of plans and snuggled up in my sleeping bag for a good night's sleep.
 

When we woke the next morning, I boiled up a pot of water for a brew and mixed up some milk to have with our muesli... It was pretty much the ritual each morning and night while we were away on our little adventure. For some strange reason, I really enjoyed making breakfast and dinner for us both. I suppose in my travels, I have learned that the teams that are most successful are the teams who can use their collective strengths to counter their collective weaknesses. I'd done all this stuff before, and probably wasn't as tired as Lisa at the end of the day, so I guess it was kinda my way of taking some of the load off and redistributing that load where we as a team had the resources.
 

The sky had deteriorated from a brilliant blue the day before to a grey mass, and we packed the tent up straight away to avoid getting it wet. We could think of few things worse than having to pitch a soggy tent that evening. Lisa's feet were still sore, but seemed to respond better to riding shoes and pedals than they did to walking (YUSSS!). We moved all our gear into the communal cooking shelter to pack up and then I made the trip back up the hill to the general store to get some supplies. The Port Fitzroy General Store is a surprisingly comprehensive outfit and I salivated as I piled fresh fruit into my basket. Something I have always found on cycle tours is that you just get sick of carbs... Fruit can be so refreshing. The last thing I put in the basket was a tiny vial of betadine iodine antiseptic for Lisa's feet... Undoubtedly, it was the best investment I made that weekend (and for the record, Lisa's feet are fine now!).
 

I returned to the campground and we packed our gear back onto the bikes to head on our way. There had been a couple of solid downpours for the morning already but the rain mostly cleared for us for the rest of the day, asides from the occasional patches of drizzle and a pretty grey sky. Our second day wasn't planned as a big one... The plan was to ride the 15-17km through Forest Road, down into Whangaparapara campground, set up our tent and then head over to Kaitoke Hot Springs. From there, I would maybe go for a little scoot up to the summit of Mount Hobson and then we could turn in for the night. It became apparent to me by the end of the day that most people ride Forest Road from the South to the North (not the other direction, as we did)... There is one very obvious reason this happens and that is that the southern end of the track sits at a 170m high point on the road, which means that the North-South route contains more climbing than descending. I neglected to notice this fact as part of my planning. 
 

Our ride along Forest Road was lovely to begin with. The rain was holding off and the bush surrounding the road was just stunning. We checked out the suspension bridge and hut just across the first creek crossing, then continued meandering southward. The road is an old disused forestry road and has been designated as the main mountain biking track on the island (although not the most exciting of trails if you are up for some fun), so the surface was pleasant to ride along, and for the first few k's, we were making really good time. Upon inspection of the maps, from what I could tell, there were two major climbs along the track. Before long, the road pitched up steeply, and we began our first climb... Then our next climb... And our next climb. And they weren’t just your average climb… They were steep, granny ring material. As often happens with topo maps and forest roads, the track wasn't plotted very accurately against the contours on the map. By the third or fourth climb, Lisa had stopped talking much to me... It wasn't that she was specifically upset with me, but it was a hard slog (especially with gear on the bike), and it probably didn't help that I kept saying "this MUST be the last one" and it invariably wasn't. It got to the point where I chose to just shut my mouth for fear of further incriminating myself. I had failed dismally in my map-reading abilities for the day and any guarantee that I gave of this being "the last climb" were completely unfounded and untrue. The track also ended up being longer than the 15km that we thought it was and I found myself begging for it to end. I'd had enough of the seemingly endless conveyor belt of climbs, and I knew Lisa was now not having a good time, and that upset me...
 

In situations like this, there is a fine line between being encouraging and being seemingly condescending. It is of utmost importance that as your significant other crests the hill, you offer encouragement, but not in such an enthusiastic manner that it seems like you have been resting there for half an hour and have bucketloads of energy to expend. A little tip... Running down the hill and then running alongside your partner up the rest of the hill whooping and hollering will often not achieve symbiotic harmony. Sometimes feigning fatigue is the biggest favor you can do yourself. I also discovered that Lisa doesn't like having her photo taken at the top of a climb (and probably justifiably so). By the time we reached the end of Forest Road, there was no question about the fact that we were not descending one side of the hill to then climb up again and go to the hot springs... An executive decision was made to go straight to camp and settle in for the evening.
 

I continue to be impressed by how resilient Lisa is. She always tells me how unfit she is and I never believe it... She is far fitter than she gives herself credit for. I also admire her ability to let go of things once they pass. It was a tough couple of hours, but it didn't take her long to return to her usual bubbly self. I love that about her... She is also the only person I know who can get away with telling me "I told you so" and "would you please eat/drink something... You are getting grumpy". Our mood improved significantly with the descent towards Whangaparapara. The campground here was a little 15 spot piece of paradise only accessible via a walking track (which unfortunately meant lifting our fully loaded bikes over fences and stiles). It was totally worth it though. The track wound its way through a beautiful piece of native forest and then onto a well-built trail benched into the bluff around the edge of the coastline. I was stoked to hear Lisa's excitement when she realised we were right on the water's edge for our campsite again tonight.
 

Whangaparapara campsite ("The Green") was just stunning. The ocean crept right up on our doorstep and the coastline was decorated with trees shaped by the wind and massive root systems that jutted out from the eroded shore. Across the bay, we could see a couple of buildings that made up Whangaparapara. We were there alone and after sweeping up the rabbit poo using a makeshift broom made out of old dead gorse bush, we pitched our tent right in front of the water's edge before settling in on the picnic table next to us for a feed of ciabatta with ham, brie and tomato (YUM!). No sooner had we emptied our drybags onto the table than a group of about 20 school kids appeared at the entrance to the campsite and started pitching their tents... I was in two minds about the experience. I think it's great that they are out doing something, but I didn't think it was appropriate for them to show up at a 15 site campground and take over (there are plenty of 60-80 site campgrounds on the island). To be fair, they gave us as much space as they could and pitched their tents away from ours, but it was certainly far removed from the serene atmosphere we had encountered on our arrival... Thank God we arrived first!
 


After lunch, we decided to go exploring sans-load. It was so nice to cruise along on our bikes without the burden of gear. Lisa joked that she couldn't believe she was voluntarily getting on her bike for fun at this point. We rode back along the trail and around the other side of the bay to Whangaparapara, where we purchased some water and sat down to enjoy a fruit juice. I always find that the ability to appreciate the smallest things is what makes a trip like this worthwhile. Our return trip to the campground involved a detour to a beautiful waterfall and swimming hole that was so cold that I thought I was going to pass out when I got in (but so refreshing, and lovely to be clean!), and then we headed back to our tent for another freeze-dried feed. I must admit that freeze-dried food tastes better than it used to, but they still don't appear to have the technology to improve the part of the meal that makes me do stinky farts (sorry Lisa).
 


The weather forecast for the night wasn’t looking too favourable, so we decided to enjoy some time out of the tent and explore the shoreline whilst it was low tide and not raining. We clambered over rocks and oysters (with our shoes on this time!), got swooped by Kingfishers and ended up on a small beach populated with millions of smooth stones where we sat and talked until the rain forced us back to the tent, grey clouds blanketing the sky right down to the horizon. There is something magic about lying in a tent while it’s raining, much the same as listening to rain on a tin roof. Everything seems louder than it actually is and you feel like you are lying in the rain without actually getting wet. We lay in the tent holding hands with one headphone each in our ears, listening to Theivery Corporation and Goldfrapp dance around inside our heads with the sound of the rain. That was probably one of my favourite moments on that trip.
 


We awoke in the morning on our last day to a brilliant blue sky. The tent had stayed intact with no leaking and was now nearly completely dry from the winds that had passed through and blown the storm away… Perfect!!! We had a cruisy breakfast, savouring the view before packing our drybags onto our racks one last time and heading back along the walking track to Whangaparapara Road. The climb out of Whangaparapara was surprisingly quick (obviously by this third day, we both had legs of steel). We passed the entrance to Forest Road and headed down the other side, past the old battalion. There was the option to continue across the road from Forest Road and sidle along the ridge high above the trees. I have no doubt it would have been a beautiful and scenic ride, but we decided instead to head down the road and check out the Kaitoke Hotpools… At least it gave us something to come back and do next time!


The hotpools are situated down a fairly long walkway, which we rode down and are a gorgeous collection of small streams and rock pools which converge into the one larger pool. It is an undeniably beautiful place… The fact that you can sit in a hotpool and enjoy the view makes it even more amazing! Places like this that truly make you marvel at nature. The sun filters through the forest and warms your soul while the trees dangle lazily over the clear water. It was the perfect place to park up and relax for an hour before continuing to make our way back via Claris to Tryphena (this time on the road).

After stopping at a café for lunch, we continued along the road at a modest pace until Lisa called me back down the hill to point out her discovery of a wild grape vine in the culvert along the side of the road. It was quite obvious that people had ravaged the vine for all its reachable crops, but this was apparently no obstacle to Lisa obtaining grapes… I’m not sure if she actually wanted to eat grapes, or whether it was the challenge of getting to them that enticed her, but what I witnessed for the next ten minutes closely resembled what I would expect an intoxicated monkey may look like swinging through the forest, wielding a large stick which was firstly used delicately as a hook, and then progressively declined to an assault on the uncooperative vine until said large stick broke several times and became a very small stick… Oh, and this monkey was wearing a tight-fitting ensemble made out of lycra… Whatever it was that Lisa was doing, it eventually worked and we sat on the side of the road literally eating the fruits of her labour.


Back on the road, and before long, we were cresting our last big hill before descending back into Tryphena, where we parked up at a cute little café to while away the time until we got back on the ferry. The ferry trip home was, in itself, an adventure… The ocean had become very choppy and I reckon that if the captain had realised how huge the swell was coming through the Colville channel, he would have likely cancelled the sailing. In stark contrast to the calm trip over to the island, we now found ourselves in a boat rocking back and forth over an 8ft swell. There was a lot of sea sickness to be had and the trip took probably an extra two hours on what it had done to sail over in the first place. Needless to say, we were relieved to disembark from the vessel of doom and hop back on our bikes for the (uphill) ride home.



Our trip to Great Barrier Island was a beautiful journey… Not just in terms of the bike ride itself, but the experience of sharing it with Lisa and learning more about each other along the way. I’ve often told people that I prefer travelling on my own… I’m not so sure now… I think if someone were to ask me now, I would likely be inclined to choose some good company over my own company. Maybe I’ve learned all I can about myself by being alone and now it’s time to embark on a new era, maybe it was the moments strung together that made it so enjoyable, or maybe I have just stumbled across a person who brings out the best in me and makes my adventures come to life all over again in a unique way. Either way, I can't wait to share my next adventure with Lisa!







Thursday, February 20, 2014

Making Peace With The Past - Finally Some Insight on My 2013 World Champs Experience



­­­­­­­­­­­­It's been months now since WEMBO 24 hour solo World Championships. I still haven't managed to sit down and write about it... My assumption that things would “quieten down” was completely unfounded and I found myself working on all those “responsible” things that adults do that I should have been doing and mixing that in with bouts of procrastination on the trails in the sunshine after work. In fact, I haven't really written about anything... And that has haunted me, day in and day out, like a monster lurking in the shadows of my mind. Without penning my thoughts, there appears to still be unfinished business with my most recent world championships experience, and I sincerely hope that in writing about it now, I can put it to rest and move onto the next thing (whatever that may be!) with energy and enthusiasm.
My training and preparation up to race day was good. In fact, generally, I had a blast... Climbing mountains and having wicked adventures on my bike with good people. I'll admit that the final month before the race, my training became a little disjointed as the pressures of work, training and life in general encroached on my rest time. The week before world champs, I became quite sick... In fact, sick enough that I had to take a couple of days off work. It was stressful, and the thought of missing out on the one event I had been training for all year was entirely unfathomable... I was 100% invested... But I felt good in my head, and I have always staunchly believed that your body is merely a vehicle for the mind to achieve what it so desires.
Finally arriving in Canberra was a relief, especially with my best buddy Sarah by my side as support crew. I felt nervous and excited, but surprisingly calm. I was intent to not let anything phase me, despite my patience being tested on a number of occasions. Such occasions included replacing my rear brake calliper the day before the race (achieved by bribing the mechanic with beer), darting from Stromlo to the airport to pick up my bro-in-law, then back to Stromlo again to pick up my bike, running out of money (I mean completely broke and maxed out credit card) on the second day we were there (thank God for my best buddy and prize money) and appeasing my parents, who (God bless them) just wanted to go out and boogey with their daughter the night before the race.
It would be remiss of me to not acknowledge that there are people who went a long way for me for this one race. Mum and Dad braved the long drive up from central Victoria to Canberra and then hung out in the cold and dark at the top of the hill to cheer for me each lap. My brother-in-law, Dan, was kindly volunteered for support duties by my sister and flew into Canberra especially for the race (Dan is a physio and gives excellent massages, by the way!). My good mate Sarah travelled all the way from NZ with me to take on the thankless task of supporting me for the race. Kashi at Yeti NZ had made arrangements for me to have a second bike for the year, pretty much identical to my race bike, which was a privilege few riders get without spending copious amounts of money. Andrew at AyUp lights had sent me out new lights which matched my bike. Mark at Adidas Eyewear had decked me out with new eyewear for the race (which was also put to good use by the support crew when I swapped out glasses!). And Bryce at Cycletech had sorted out sexy new wheels for my Ninja. I think it would be fair to say that I felt I was going into the race not only racing for myself, but also for those people who believed in me. I wanted to be able to write about the experience after and be proud of what I had achieved.

This is where I begin to struggle… I wasn’t necessarily proud of what I achieved that weekend… Not remotely… I didn’t enjoy it, I didn’t get a good result, and I felt nothing afterwards except a sense of relief that it was over.
When I arrived at the track on race day, my belly full of two breakfasts from the morning, I plugged my ears with some tunes and strolled casually to the pit that my crew had set up so lovingly. My bikes were lined up, and all my food laid out. It had been some time since I had been amongst this but it felt familiar, like a home I never left. I got on my bike and did some cruisy warm-up laps of the starting circuit. I bumped into people I hadn’t seen in years, including people I used to rock climb with who were also now bikers… But it occurred to me that I could count on one hand the number of people who had been doing this 24 hour solo gig for as long as me. I was part of the furniture here, and it made me feel kinda proud to be a “veteran” of sorts on the scene.
I’d be lying if I didn’t say I was there to stand on the podium… At a bare minimum, top 5. And the expectation I placed on myself was founded in my result from last year in Italy, when I came 3rd. I’d been shy about broadcasting my own expectations of myself but the people who mattered knew where I wanted to be, and those who asked politely would be privy to the information, too. So there I stood on the start line, in my moment of truth.
The starters gun went off, we ran to our bikes and then thrashed ourselves up the first fire trail. My legs felt sluggish and my heart rate was running high. It was nothing unusual… Just nerves, I guessed… And I assumed my body would settle into a rhythm over the first lap or two… But that pace off the start line was super hot… In fact, hot enough that I couldn’t hold the front bunch, and they disappeared up the first bit of single track without me. It wasn’t how I imagined it would pan out. In fact, it wasn’t how anyone I knew imagined it, but they were the cards I was dealt at the start of this race and I was going to have to work with that. I remember years ago speaking to my mate Andy Fellows after I had a shit day on the bike at the Red Centre Enduro in Alice Springs… He said to me, “sometimes, you are having a shit day, and you just have to say to yourself “well, that’s what I have to work with today””… For some reason, that conversation comes into my head a lot, and it came into my head at the start of that day. I vividly remember thinking “it’s ok Megan. You have 24 hours to do this. You have the experience to do this. Just let them blow each other up and reel them in later”… But they didn’t, and I never did. All I could do was ride around in circles chasing 6th or 7th place.
I rode through the day and as I did, my interest waned with my realisation that I was a long, long way off the pointy end. My feet swelled in my shoes from the heat until the pain was unbearable. Swapping shoes did nothing, massage did nothing, loosening the shoes did nothing, and neither did the Panadol. It wasn’t until the coolness of the evening set in that the pressure subsided and the pain throbbing through my feet and up my legs stopped. It wasn’t all bad… The trails at Stromlo are fast and good fun… The dry environment sucked all the moisture out of the dirt leaving us with a pea gravel surface that threatened to be our undoing if we didn’t pay constant attention. Mum and Dad sat in camp chairs at the top of the hill, wrapped in blankets ready to jump up and cheer “GO MEG!”every time I rode past. My partner was back home in NZ checking her phone every thirty seconds while she was at dinner with her mates to see how I was doing. I felt like I was letting down everyone around me. As an intelligent person, I knew that wasn’t true… But often emotions override what we know to be genuinely correct.
The coolness of the evening was welcoming… I had just spent the entire winter training in the early morning in sub zero temperatures and the heat of the day had not treated me well at all… I’ve been living away from Australia long enough now that I have acclimatised to New Zealand’s cooler temperatures and the heat of the day enveloped me and sucked the energy from my body.
While I was riding I felt numb... And completely detached from the experience... This wasn't what I was used to. I just wanted it to be over pretty much from the end of the first lap. I wasn’t angry, nor did I gain immense joy out of the experience. I took each moment as it came and lived in that moment… The moment I rode past a snake… The moment Dan helped alleviate the pressure on my feet… The moment Sarah put hot pizza in my hand… The moment my mum would come running alongside me in the dark after midnight at the top of that arsehole hill… The moment the sun set and the moment it rose, spreading it’s arms like fingers through a blue sky perfectly spotted with identical fluffy white clouds and hot air balloons. They were a series of beautiful moments in their own right, but for some reason felt disjointed as a complete experience when I tried to link them together. The trail was great fun and I thought about a lot of stuff while I was riding. I wouldn’t say I had a bad ride… But certainly not an exceptional one.
By the time I crossed the finish line, I had pretty much decided that this was the last 24 hour solo race that I was going to do (admittedly, my view of that has softened over time since the race). I was heartbroken. And when I write about it now, it still brings tears to my eyes. I’m not sure what made it so. Probably a combination of things… The fact that I had trained so hard and being so far off the pace, the thought that I may not want to do this again and realising that I would miss it dearly and wondering what I would fill that void with… The fact that I felt like I had let down all those people who supported and believed in me (although I know they would all vehemently deny that this was the case).
I suppose when someone is disappointed with a result, the first thing people try to do is console you by assuring you that had you enjoyed a more trouble-free day on the bike, the result would have been vastly different. Sure, there were things that didn’t go right… I was sick the week before, I had massive issues with painful swelling of my feet, I had sleep monsters and food issues… But if I am being honest with myself, there wasn’t four laps worth in there… Maybe two at best… And that would have elevated me, best scenario, to 5th place. I was well off the pace… And the even more heartbreaking thing was that I had no idea that would be the case.
I was glad that Jess Douglas won. If I couldn’t come up with the goods, then I’m glad she did. I have a huge amount of respect for that girl and I think in a lot of ways, we are very similar (she’s just a shitload faster than me), so I relate to Jess as a person. After the race, she wrote something on my facebook wall. It was a lovely gesture, and admittedly, made me cry (maybe I’m going soft in my old age); Megan - you are awesome. Results of this race today do not indicate your inner strength as you would hope. But everyone has their day in the sunshine. Yours will come with renewed purpose...and it need not be via racing....let’s talk soon! We love who you are and what you represent. It meant a lot coming from her.
I remember arriving home from the race and seeing my partner at the airport. I’d imagined, up until the end of the race, that I would arrive home full of smiles and stoked with my result but it wasn’t to be on this occasion. We’d only been seeing each other barely a month and I was so grateful to have a hug, someone to hold my hand and some gentle words waiting for me at the other end of my journey. I think one of the hardest things about my result was having "that conversation" with every single person when I came home. Explaining how I was disappointed and then having them say "but 7th in the world is still good!" I appreciated the sentiment, but it truly made me cringe every time. I didn't spend six months getting up at 4am to train in the freezing cold then spend all that money on traveling to the event to come seventh. Then there was the awkward conversations with people who knew I would be disappointed, but didn't know whether it was the right thing to console me or avoid the topic.
I’ve often said to people that there are two types of people who race at a high level… Those who work hard, and those who are naturally talented. I work exceptionally hard, but I wouldn’t call myself a naturally talented rider by any stretch of the imagination. I suppose where it gets really tough is when you come up against people who are both naturally talented and work hard, and it inevitably happens.
I find it difficult to articulate how I felt about my experience last year, and especially so because I really do love to put a positive spin on any challenges that are thrown my way. But to be blunt about it, I was disappointed with my result at World Champs. I returned home a broken soul. I analysed in my head everything I could have done differently, or should have done differently. And as time has worn on, nothing changes my disappointment. In fact, I don't think I have ever been so disappointed by a race result. In my mind, there was no provision for anything shy of 5th place, and I guess mentally, you have to do that to back yourself, but you set yourself up for a very hard fall... In reality, only one person can win... And unfortunately, someone has to come seventh. That's the brutal reality of racing... And despite the fact that I wasn't unhappy with how I rode, on that day, my best was only worth seventh place. In all truthfulness though, as much as it hurts, I think I would rather that than to not care about it at all.
I've been thinking hard about what I want to do moving forward. From a pragmatic perspective, I know in my heart I was well off the pace, and it was gutting for me that I was surprised by this... There were things that didn't go right, but if I'm being honest with myself, I doubt there was four laps worth in there. I rode 323km over the 24 hours, and a couple of years ago, that sort of distance would have bagged me a title... But riders have gotten faster and the competition more fierce and I feel like I have been caught unawares and unprepared for the change in pace. It shouldn't have come as a surprise when I remember three or four years ago, hearing my mate, Andy Fellows describe the pace of the men's field as "a 24 hour cross country race". It was only a matter of time until the same happened with the women's field, and I can't begrudge the competition of that. It's great for the sport to see such a high quality field. I just can't help but feel I am flailing behind and wondering if I have the energy and time to work harder than I did this year to bridge that gap. Furthermore, after 9 years of riding 24 hour races, it's becoming cost prohibitive to travel around the world racing bikes off my own back.
On the flip side of that, racing bikes for 24 hours is what has defined me on so many levels for such a long period of time and I am very wary of the gaping hole it would leave in my life if I decided not to continue. As sad as it may sound, I feel like riding my bike for 24 hours is the only thing that makes me an extraordinary person, and the only thing that makes me interesting. It has played a significant role in moulding who I am as a person today, and whilst I am sure some other adventure would come along and continue to condition my spirit in other ways, it's nearly unfathomable for me... Not to mention that I love doing it... I love that feeling at the end of being totally spent. I love seeing the sunset and the sunrise on the bike in the space of one day, I love the physical challenge, the mental challenge and the tactical side of it. I love the people I meet and the experiences it delivers to me.
So if I was to make a sensible, intellectual decision, in a pragmatic sense, I would stop participating in 24 hour races... But such decisions aren't so easily pigeon-holed when there is emotion and history involved. There has been a lot of talk recently about the next world champs in Scotland in October this year, and I have decided that I won’t be attending… Amongst other considerations, I simply just can’t afford it, and I know that come October, I will be watching everyone else’s progress and feeling my own heart ache, but it was a decision that had to be made for me to continue to enjoy living in the moment right now. For now, I have made the decision to compete in 24 Hours of NDuro in Rotorua in April (check it out here... It'll be wicked!). In the meantime, I’m enjoying hitting the trails for fun, heading out for crazy adventures, digging in the garden and playing with my dogs. It’s a relief to write again and share my experience so candidly with everyone who reads my blog. What I do know is that regardless of what I do, I can count on the fact that there will always be adventures to be had, and I can only trust that takes me to more wonderful places for more amazing experiences, whether it involves racing bikes for 24 hours or not.